My life began in a small country home, with 3 sisters and 1 brother. We lived on a dirt road outside of a small city. I married at the age of 17, became a mother to a daughter and son, divorced after 15 years and I am still single today. As I write and look back I treasure my memories from my growing up years and becoming a mother. When we treasure our memories the treasures are memories that are beautiful and those that are painful. Yet, for all of us whether good or bad, they are what shape us into the men and women we are today.
In the last few weeks, I began to feel a restlessness that arrived at unexpected times of my day. This morning as I started my day this restless arrived again. I stopped what I was doing and decided to see if today was the day for me to understand the meaning of my restlessness. It is the day.
As I looked at photos, the answer arrived with more clarity. I am experiencing restlessness from people from my past, and my current life who are waiting for me to return to the person I use to be. It continued when a gentleman asked me to sit down with him, and he would share with me what I did wrong in the past. Of course I turned him down, because these kind of issues are best for us to meet with people we trust and approach such topics with a gentle spirit.
I smile as I upload my photos to share with you. I smile as the answer to my restlessness arrives. My travels and circumstances changed my life forever, and there is no turning back. It is a time of letting go and moving on, even when others try to hold on to us tightly. Our life is a journey and we change as we experience new things, whether they are experiences of joy or pain! Change is good!
Is there anything or anyone that you need to let go of today? Are you living in a new season of life and allowing others to keep you from the joy of the new season? Do not allow others to hinder your dreams, your desires, and hold on to you as you move ahead. Travel, write and experience each day to the fullest.
Recently, I watched a video of a woman being ordained in a denomination that previously rejected, said harsh words, and broke the hearts of many women. I had no idea that watching this video would be the catalyst to cause me to start writing again. The most difficult part of watching this was that the same people who rejected, spoke harsh words, and said, “Nancy Pastor = man are now licensing women.”
The same men who said, “Nancy no one will hire you, you are a woman. Unfortunately this also brings back the memory of the man chasing me in the University parking lot, trying to talk me into stepping out of the University Pastoral Ministry program. There were women who told me to be quiet because they said, I was causing problems and they did not believe women should be allowed to be Pastors. In fact the one who gave…
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As I listen to this song all kinds of relationships apply to this song. For me this song reminds me that as we build a team for The Relationship Project, we will build a team that will stand by each other. Maybe someone needs to hear these words tonight. A few times in my life organizations threw me overboard and disconnected. BUT it did not stop me from moving forward or continuing on with what I am to do in this world.
Tonight I finally received confirmation of the why a group threw me overboard. What I was observing without speaking was right on! Many times people will give us a reason that is not the true reason. Beware of people who are ladder climbers, they will sacrifice you for their gain. They will even talk about you behind your back and there will be times they will reveal the truth without realizing they are revealing it. Listen closely to what is said and what is written.
If one group of people throw us overboard, it does not mean we must discontinue our vision or plan. In fact what usually happens is we will find ourselves in the middle of a new group of people and what we are working on will grow to huge proportions if we DO NOT GIVE UP, stay focused and be discerning with who we bring up close to our projects. Whether your dream is to write or to travel; make a plan, set short term goals and long term goals, take a step and eventually you will find yourself at your destination.
As for me, I am standing with you! As for my readers, make a decision and do not give up! (Nancy J. the author of Life Time Writer.)
Today I decided to live my day in quiet contemplation. I thought of my trip to Africa a few years ago and 3 others countries. These trips changed my life forever. In fact they changed the way I listen in the U.S.A. They changed what I see as struggle in comparison to those who complain in the U.S.A.
Today after church I made my way to a local McDonald’s, ordered a coffee and a chicken sandwich and found a quiet corner. I sat with my tablet, paper and pen and wrote a few thoughts on what I will be writing on this week.
A young couple sat next to me and we began a conversation about technology. They left and replaced by a family. We also had an interesting conversation and we laughed together. Their grade school children were having problems imagining what life was like before games and smart phones.
Eventually I packed everything up and wished my new friends a good day and made my way to my car. A young man began to chat with me about the weather. I stopped and we laughed and we chatted. As I drove away I thought of the many people who try to take away my joy in this season of my life. They are the ones who want me to live immersed in their struggles and listen 24/7. They forget that those who lead and listen have feelings too. You see this all began a couple of weeks ago when I was hanging out with friends.
In our conversation these were the words that flowed out of my lips, “I have no life, living here.” I am reminded of the same words tonight, I decided I will not feel guilty for taking a break from listening to others in this city.
This is my season, and I am walking into new relationships with a decision to choose joy. With a focus on my family who I love very much.
This morning I opened my eyes at 5:30 a.m. This is very unusual for this late night person. Very seldom to I find myself unable to sleep, but when I do, instead of fighting to go back to sleep, I get up and begin my morning.
Today in the early a.m. I quietly began to make a cup of coffee, no music playing in the background, no voices of others, no contact with the outside world. Just me and my morning, waiting for the sun to rise, knowing then the quiet will disappear.
Yesterday I stumbled across this song and once again today it is speaking to me in the quiet of the morning, intertwined with this verse. A soft prompting reminds me, “Be Still And Know That I Am God.”
30Though youths grow weary and tired,
And vigorous young men stumble badly,
31Yet those who wait for the LORD
Will gain new strength;
They will mount up with wings like eagles,
They will run and not get tired,
They will walk and not become weary.
Today I sit quietly as I work. It is a writing and designing day. It is raining in my area and for me, this brings a peacefulness that surrounds me. Rainy days bring back memories that cause me to smile. The season when my children were not old enough to attend school and I was a stay at home mom were precious days.
The play for the day was inside; lunch, naps, books and scattered toys, as we laughed together. At times a little fighting between my two children would break out, but nothing major. Except for reading the newspaper, watching the news on T.V. or spending time with friends and family we lived in our little shut in world. It was a season of life, with no internet, no social networks, or a blog to write on.
I ask myself this question today, “Would I trade today for yesterday?” No, because now my children are grown, they are on their own and this is our season of life. Yesterday, is in the distance and I smile as it continues to rain. For this season of life, is precious to me in a new way. The beauty of a season, on a quiet rainy day.
1- There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens:
2 a time to be born and a time to die, a time to plant and a time to uproot, 3 a time to kill and a time to heal, a time to tear down and a time to build, 4 a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance, 5 a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them, a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing, 6 a time to search and a time to give up, a time to keep and a time to throw away, 7 a time to tear and a time to mend, a time to be silent and a time to speak, 8 a time to love and a time to hate, a time for war and a time for peace.